Monday, 3 February 2014
Celebrity Spotting
My colleagues and I like to play a game of trying to spot famous celebrities, generally whilst travelling. My friend Dan likes to bend the rules slightly by calling out the names of famous actors he's mingled with after theatre productions in the West End, but, whilst there's no denying that spotting Dame Helen Mirren has major kudos, if you spend time with thesps in theatre land, you're quite likely to bump into a major board-treader.
Mike and I have a more purist view of the game: they have to be people spotted in an airport, on a plane or in an airport lounge. Mike's most recent spot was Sarah Ferguson. Mine was Noel Gallagher. My previous spots have included Richard Bacon and Sue Perkins. It's a mildly diverting game.
Outside of travelling, I have seen two major Hollywood celebrities on the street. The first was Kiefer Sutherland, who I saw at approximately 8.30 in the morning wandering through a deserted Covent Garden, dressed in a blue suit, wearing sunglasses, smoking a cigarette and bearing a facial expression that said 'Yes, it's me, and yes, I am way too cool for school.' My family and I had come down to London after our flight to Portugal had been cancelled thanks to that Icelandic ash cloud back in 2010; he, I would later discover from reading a newspaper, was stranded in London for the same reason, only whereas we had spent a civilised night in our Canary Wharf hotel, he had spent the night partying, and evidently whilst we were on our way out to breakfast, he was on his way home.
My personal favourite spot, and the one that prompted this piece, was last May while we were on holiday in New York. This was our second family trip to the Big Apple, and the third for M. and I. Whenever we head to NY I think we're going to be bumping into celebrities on every block, but of course we never do. They hide, evidently.
So it was our first night in Manhattan and we'd gone for a major wander to re-orient ourselves. Our aim was to find a branch of Whole Foods somewhere downtown, but we ended up getting thoroughly lost, and instead found ourselves in Greenwich Village - arguably the most confusing part of the island thanks to its London-esque jumble of streets - and popped into a D'Agostino on Greenwich Street for over-priced supplies.
When we came out, sixty-odd dollars lighter, it had started to drizzle. On the street we saw a big man riding a bike. He looked reasonably familiar, but it was only when he got off the bike and chained it to a lamppost that I realised it was Philip Seymour Hoffman. I think I probably whispered 'Look, that's you-know-who!' to M. in that vaguely star-struck too-loud voice you inevitably use on such occasions, which unintentionally caught his attention.
In response, he just nodded sagely, raised a hand and offered a small, slightly embarrassed smile. Later we found out he lived in that part of town and that he'd just come out of a spell in rehab. In the celeb spotting stakes, an Oscar winner riding a bike after time kicking drugs was up there with the best.
Less than a year later he was dead from a suspected overdose.
Rest in peace PSH.
Saturday, 1 February 2014
In The Early Morning Security Queue, Heathrow
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| Source: Wikipedia |
It's
just after five in the morning and I'm fourth in line at the fast
track security search queue at Heathrow's Terminal 5. Immediately in
front of me is a young girl who is dressed as if she's about to head
off to a jungle somewhere - sturdy boots, practical
clothes, heavily-laden rucksack. In front of her are two large
African-American women with big handbags and scarves and hats.
The
security guard is a brusque, efficient,
unsmiling Australian woman who has a facial expression that suggests
she resents having to work at this early hour. The trays on the
conveyor passing through the x-ray are backed up and nothing is
moving.
The
first African-American lady puts her items into one of the large grey
plastic trays when a gap in the conveyor
appears and wanders off through the metal detector, swiftly followed
by the second woman, only the second woman is wearing what might be
boots, but as they're tucked beneath her jeans, it's hard to tell.
The Australian guard calls the woman back and asks her, not
unpolitely but certainly firmly, if she's wearing boots. The woman
grunts something that I can't make out and hands her boots to the
guard and then huffs off toward the gate again.
The
Australian guard could easily have let it
pass, but chooses not to, and says something officious back about
rules and regulations that clearly winds the woman up further. She
turns back, makes a complaint about why she should even have to take
her boots off anyway, just at the point where the guard is lowering
the boots into one of the woman's two trays, this one holding her
coat. Still complaining, the woman grabs the boots and thrusts them
into her other tray, the one containing her ridiculously over-sized
handbag, presumably affronted at the way the guard could have dirtied
her coat by placing her boots there.
It's
clear that the Australian guard is not
going to take this lying down and offers a perfunctory retort, bereft
of any hesitation or pause for breath.
'Madam
if you object to having to take your boots off
I suggest you avoid travelling in the future.' It's a perfectly
barbed response, but it's evident that this response has no real
purpose whatsoever; it's just designed to antagonise, and that's
exactly what it does.
The
woman responds with some low growl or other
and the Australian looks momentarily shocked. I honestly thought she
was going to get a burly security guard over and have the woman
denied the opportunity to fly, but instead she just responds with a
defensive 'My God, it's not even six in the morning and you want to
argue,' as if there is an official start time from which one is
allowed to enter into disagreements with one another. The woman
waddles off through the metal detector and the young girl in front of
me mutely and compliantly removes her sturdy boots and places then in
a tray.
The
Australian guard is evidently not finished with the African-American
woman and what she does next is both passive-aggressive
and final proof that she absolutely maintains the upper hand in this
whole business. I watch as she calmly wanders down to the guards at
the other end of the belt, whispers something out of the side of her
mouth to one of them and goes back to her station. I may have
imagined a small smile on her face as she did so.
Soon,
I'm on the other side of the metal
detector, waiting for my own tray to descend down the rollers toward
me. The jungle trek girl and the two African-American are next to me,
and the two women are evidently moaning about what just happened. The
first woman's tray emerges from the x-ray and teeters slowly down the
rollers toward where she's waiting. When the other woman's bag
emerges, it pauses momentarily before being mechanically shoved over
onto a separate set of rollers, meaning that the bag is now only
accessible to the security guards at this end of the belt.
'Why is my
bag that side?' pleads the woman.
The
guard responds blankly that it needs to be opened and the contents
completely emptied and checked thoroughly.
He glances back at the Australian guard who is beaming innocently.
It's clear that the woman poses no major terrorist threat and that
they'll find nothing remotely unacceptable in her bag, but in
thinking she's got the upper hand when dealing with the authorities,
she's misplaced where she sits in the pecking order of things, and
now she's paying the price.
I
wander off to the lounge to get some breakfast,
wondering if they'll cart her off to a room nearby for a more
comprehensive search for no other reason than to teach her a lesson.
I wonder if she'll think twice before answering back next time.
Saturday, 30 November 2013
Alcohol
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| Source: BBC |
I
decided to give up drinking alcohol for a month. I'd seen the posters
for Octsober, a month-long initiative to make people aware of alcohol
abuse, similar to this month's Movember, during which time men grow
their facial hair to raise awareness of testicular cancer; I'd seen
the poster, but didn't feel terribly compelled to participate in a
month-long spell of enforced alcohol abstinence. I'm not good at
feeling like I'm being told to do something by a marketing campaign.
Be
assured, I'm not a alcoholic, nor do I consider myself to have any
sort of drinking problem, and in fact, in contrast to others I know,
I barely drink at all. I never drink on a school night, I hardly ever
drink if I'm at a work dinner or on the rare occasion I go out for
after-work drinks, I can only think of a handful of occasions where
I've shared a whole bottle of wine with my wife during the course of
an evening, and my principal alcohol consumption is confined to a
couple of cocktails on a Friday and Saturday night and a glass of
wine with lunch on a Sunday. In this sense, I'm not that different to
my younger self; I didn't drink that much as a student and I can
probably count the number of times I've been properly wasted on two
hands. In fact, I wrote a post for my first blog (The First Days Of
My Thirties) a few years ago that covered my mild misdemeanours with
alcohol, and I have no other notable additions to make to that list.
When I had a compulsory medical in my first few weeks of starting at
university in 1995, in response to the question 'Has anyone commented
on the amount you drink?' I put 'Yes, people say I don't drink
enough.' The doctor didn't see the funny side of this. So, in
summary, I don't think I have a problem, but then again, I imagine
that most people with an alcohol problem don't think they do either.
The
opportunity to abstain for a month came with the confluence of the
bottles of vodka, gin and Bacardi in our house all running dry at more or less the
same time. These are the bases I use for most of the cocktails I make
so it meant spending anything up to £70 on three bottles of booze in
one go. Money being tight anyway these days and with Christmas coming
up, the idea of that expenditure was hard to justify, in the same way
as I'd find it hard to justify buying music or an expensive hobby
right now.
So
for the entire month of November not a drop of alcohol passed my
lips. I'd like to say that I felt better for it, but for some reason
the only real benefit seems to have been financial. The month of
abstention seemed to coincide with a period of unsettled sleep for
our youngest daughter, and so I still woke up on Saturday and Sunday
mornings during November with a jaded feeling, just as if I'd had a
few drinks the night before. I'm sure my body appreciated the detox
on some level, but I suspect you need to drink a lot more than I do
to feel a major benefit.
But
maybe there was one major benefit of the month off: I didn't miss
alcohol at all. I didn't drive home from the train station after work
on a Friday looking forward to a gin and tonic, or idly look through
my cocktail books on a Saturday afternoon looking for interesting
recipes to make, and in spite of having a pretty stressful period at
work, I don't remember once thinking to myself that I needed a drink
after an especially gruelling day in the office.
Still,
that was November. It's now practically December, the time for
Christmas traditions; mulled wine, the first alcohol I will
have consumed in a month is being prepared, its boozy, fruity, spicy
fragrance filling my kitchen. The Christmas drinks cupboard is
being restocked and festive cocktail recipes are being pulled out of
the Saturday papers.
Cheers.
Monday, 10 June 2013
My First New York (Ecco, 2010) / A Return To The Bryant Park Hotel, New York
My
First New York (Ecco, 2010)
My
First New York compiles fifty-six bite-sized recollections of
artists, models, film-makers, journalists, actors and writers, all
detailing their first impressions of the city upon arriving as
residents. The articles were first published in New York Magazine as
part of a series.
The
personal history of each of the contributors is, in a way, secondary
to a sort of fragmented history of New York and what has made its
appeal so great. Stories of immigrants like film-maker Jonas Mekas,
arriving through Ellis Island from oppression in Eastern Europe,
recount the sheer awe of arriving in the new world, Manhattan's
southern topography being the first view of New York many arriving by
boat would see. There are recollections of those constantly-shifting
immigrant communities, illegal sub-lets, parties, coincidences,
success and above all, an idefinable sense of what makes living in
New York such a major aspiration for many people (despite being, as
one person recounts, roughly five times as expensive as anywhere
else).
Arriving
in New York as a tourist brings with it a thrill of suddenly being
forced into a giant movie set, the architecture familiar from
countless uncredited cameo appearances. My First New York perfectly
illustrates the magnetic pull of Manhattan that makes people want to
go and live there, as well as the economic realities (the cost of a
small apartment in most cases is frightening) and the challenges and
risks - one depiction of hard drug deals being conducted on every
corner in the outlaw yuppie Eighties is one especially vivid tale.
For
anyone ruing their life's journey ensuring that they will only ever
be a mere tourist in the city, My First New York allows you to see,
through others' experiences, what it might have been like to live
there, while also providing a fascinating compact history of the city
over the past hundred odd years.
A
Return To The Bryant Park Hotel, New York
| The Bryant Park Hotel. Source: MJA Smith |
It
depends on personal choice - some people like the idea of always
staying somewhere they've not been to before; others prefer the
familiarity of somewhere they've previously stayed. As a generally
risk-averse kind of guy, I know I definitely fall into the latter
category. So when we got back to the UK after a week's stay at the
Bryant Park Hotel in April 2012, we more or less straight away
decided that we'd stay there again when we returned to New York in
May of this year.
My
review of the hotel from last year is somewhere else amongst the
plethora of positive comments about this excellent hotel. At the time
I regarded it as the best hotel I'd ever stayed at. That view was
based on not only the accommodation (smart, minimal, great views
across Bryant Park from the suite we had) but also, critically, the
people working there. A crucial factor in being so impressed by the
people working at the hotel was, first and foremost, their
friendliness. I don't honestly know how many rooms there are at the
Bryant Park, but to always have a smiling 'Good morning Mr Smith' as
you walked past the lobby does make you feel right at home, and like
your stay matters to them. The staff also went out of their way to
make our two young daughters feel every bit as special and welcome as
we were made to feel, something that I frankly wasn't expecting in a
hotel that outwardly seems so trendy.
Two
of the staff that made our 2012 stay so special - Chase and Sarah -
were still working at the hotel when we returned to the hotel this
year. Getting a personal, familiar welcome after goodness knows how
many guests have passed by that reception desk was a really nice
touch, and it set the tone for what turned out - predictably, I might
stress - another great stay at the hotel. Sarah, who the girls had
struck up a friendship with last year, went out of her way to make
them feel special, going out to the Crumbs bakeshop just across
Bryant Park to bring them balloons and cupcakes while we were getting
unpacked in the room, for which she was rewarded with copious
drawings and thank you notes on Bryant Park stationary from the room.
I
don't intend to go into detail this time around as I think my
previous review covered that just fine. However, suffice to say that
the hotel truly felt like a home from home, our Bryant Park Suite on
the sixteenth floor was perfect, the service from everyone was
faultless, everything about our stay was spot on, and we've already
come to the conclusion that come what may, we have to go back and
stay here again next year; I can't honestly bring myself to
contemplate a year where we don't stay at this very, very special
hotel.
A
big thanks again to everyone at the hotel who made the stay this year
so memorable. Home suite home indeed.
This
post originally appeared on TripAdvisor on 09.06.2013
Saturday, 11 May 2013
Another London Saturday - 16 February 2013
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| Source: MJA Smith |
After a slow start to the day, we jumped in our car and drove down the M1 to Stanmore to pick up the Jubilee Line - one of the few lines actually running that day - to head into London. Mrs S's parents always used to use Stanmore and the Jubilee Line to get into London when she was a little girl, and so it's become our chosen means of getting into the West End on a weekend as well. Considering that most days of the week I catch a train from Bletchley into London, driving on the motorway and then using the Jubilee Line seems a bit odd to me, but equally Mrs S and I have had so many weekends, admittedly before the kids were born, where the trains from Euston were replaced by buses that seemed to take an interminable time to get home that driving and then taking the Jubilee Line doesn't seem that ridiculous after all.
As
is more or less customary, we took the train to Baker Street.
Daughter 1 (six) spent the entire journey reading a book from our local
village library and Daughter 2 (four) sat next to me chatting away,
fidgeting, trying to figure out where we were on the Tube map and
generally getting excited about a trip to London. A few years ago she
was intimidated by the Tube, hoping that every stop we reached was
the one we'd be getting off at and getting a little freaked out after
Finchley Road when the line goes underground, but perseverance and
conditioning has paid off and she's fine now. Daughter 1 associates
the Tube with reading, having read her first book all by herself on
the way back one Sunday when she was four. The book was The Tiger Who
Came To Tea, bought at Daunt on Marylebone High Street. A couple of
years later and she's now reading lengthy classic novels. I'm both
proud and more than a little horrified by her reading age.
At
Baker Street we dodged the hordes of people queuing and making a
nuisance of themselves on the pavement outside Madame Tussaud, not
for the first time wondering what the appeal of that place is. Over
Baker Street and through the parish church onto Marylebone High
Street, stopping briefly at a market stall in the churchyard so that
the girls could sample some very reasonably-priced macaroons that a
pleasant young lady offered them. I regret not rewarding her
generosity with a purchase but I'm sure she'll be there again.
We've
been coming to Marylebone now for a few years. If I could live
anywhere in London it would probably be here, and I really like the
fact that on any given day you hear a curious number of American
voices. It's like there's a book somewhere in the States that says
any hedge fund manager, executive or well-heeled director should make
a beeline for property in Marylebone if they find themselves needing
to transfer to London for an extended period. People say Marylebone
is like a village, and I guess it is in the sense that there's a
distinct feeling of community that feels totally different from, say,
vapid, commercial, gaudy Oxford Street only a few hundred metres
away; perhaps it's a village in the same way that New York's West and
East villages are villages, i.e. really expensive, still trendy but a
long way from the small communities they once were.
In
these more straitened times, we eschewed our normal browsing in the
Conran Shop but Mrs S couldn't avoid nipping into Cath Kidston to top-up on mugs, presents and other stuff that I turned a blind eye to. While
she was nattering to a member of staff, the girls and I played a game
with the wall of loose buttons that they have downstairs, each of us
asking to find a particular button based on briefly mentioning its
attributes in vague details. An example: 'Who can find me a blue
button shaped like a triangle?' Seeing buttons arranged like that
reminds me of trips to a haberdashers called Fred Winter in
Stratford-upon-Avon with my mother as a child; trips to town with her
invariably involved a trip to either that shop or another one to buy
wool, buttons or a pattern. The girls and I have played this game
once before, and I think that it's one of the few things that could
well hold their attention for a whole day.
From
Cath Kidston, down Marylebone High Street to Daunt. Daunt
is an independent bookshop that I've written about before. Its
principal attraction today was the tiny wooden stools at the back of
the ground floor's childrens' department, the girls both pulling
books from the shelves, grabbing a stool and reading (in Daughter 1's
case, quickly and silently; in Daughter 2's case, quickly, loudly and
whilst making up her own story in spite of being able to read a lot
of the words herself). Daughter 2 seemed to struggle with the concept
that because we'd entered a bookshop from which we'd bought books
previously that didn't mean that we would automatically be buying
her a book today. The classic 'It's a week until your birthday,' line
did little to assuage her, and so we left quicker than we wanted, one
very disappointed little girl in tow. I briefly gazed in the window
of Oxfam, knowing that at the back of the store is a really good
selection of vinyl records; it took all my reserves of willpower not
to fly in there to thumb through the racks.
From
Marylebone High Street to Charing Cross Road, past swanky houses,
offices, embassies and the various medical and therapy practices
clustered around Harley Street, Daughter 2 and I counting cabs and
disagreeing over whether the game should include the new Mercedes
taxis or just classic cabs, catching glimpses of the BT tower and
reminiscing about the time we saw James McAvoy filming a scene for a
film that turned out to be Danny Boyle's Trance one Saturday
afternoon on Harley Street. On Great Portland Street we looked in the
window of Villandry, making a commitment that next time we spent the
day in London we should either visit there, or somewhere else, and
avoid the habitual trip to Giraffe. Passing through Soho Square we
remembered walking through there in the summer, people sunbathing and
relaxing next to a mix of old and modern statues that Daughter 2
found hilarious. On this particular Saturday someone chanting a very
half-hearted 'Hare Krishna' made Daughter 1 furrow her brow and
whisper 'What's she
doing?' with teenage-esque disdain.
We
reached Charing Cross Road via Manette Street, passing the unusual
sight of a golden forearm jutting from above a doorway next to
Foyles's side entrance which we all found funny to see, though the
naturally inquisitive part of me wanted to know exactly what it was
doing there (turns out it's the entrance to Goldbeaters' Hall). Mrs S
and Daughter 1 being way too early for the matinee of Midnight Tango
we'd arranged the day in London around, we ducked into Foyles and let
the kids read books while we passed the time. Never mind that they'd
done exactly the same in Daunt no more than two hours before; they
approached it with precisely the same amount of zeal, and not for the
first time did I hope that their enthusiasm for reading will continue
beyond childhood.
Doors
at the Phoenix Theatre, a beautiful but cosy theatre whose main
entrance is tucked away on Flitcroft Street, opened at around 2.30,
and so Daughter 2 and I said our farewells and set off for own
afternoon of excitement in the capital. The idea had been to take her
to the Transport Museum in Covent Garden, but having finally got into
the main piazza after battling through the throng of tourists trying
to squeeze into the Tube station on the corner of Long Acre - despite
ample signs recommending walking the short distance to Leicester
Square instead - and the crowds of people watching the gold-painted
human statues, we discovered a queue outside the Transport Museum
that easily consisted of fifty people. I'd wanted to take Daughter 2
to see the exhibition of posters marking the 150th anniversary of the
Underground that had opened the day before, but I hadn't reckoned on
its popularity being so great, and neither had I considered that it
was the first day of half term for a lot of kids. Though I was a
little deflated, Daughter 2 managed to maintain a cheery disposition
in spite of the disappointment and showed that kids actually don't
need that much entertainment after all when she said 'All I really
want to do is go for a muffin at Starbucks, daddy.'
At
The Strand we passed a Starbucks but it was too busy, queues up to
the door and a solitary seat outside that was hardly appealing on a
cold day, and before we knew it we were crossing Waterloo Bridge, the
idea having formed in my mind to take her to the South Bank where
cafes are generally less busy, where there's a bit more breathing
space and where the possibility of a free visit to Tate Modern would
make up for the museum trip I'd promised her.
The
South Bank generally has a vibrancy and buzz that means it's more or
less impossible not to see something interesting, quirky or downright
daft as you walk along. That Saturday afternoon it took the form of a
beach on the foreshore of the Thames, complete with a
sand-sculpted sofa upon which two guys were playing guitars, bongos
and singing for coins - and a guy in formal tails 'playing' a tuba to
a CD while blowing flames out of the top of his instrument. Daughter
2 found that alternately hilarious and a little freaky. We stopped
for the muffin she wanted at the Oxo Tower branch of EAT, covered her
little face in plenty of chocolate while I sipped a latte and finally
offered me the half she decided she couldn't quite manage.
Heading
back onto the South Bank we got caught in the inevitable throng of
people bottlenecking their way through the tunnel at Blackfriars
Bridge. Blackfriars has been undergoing a major overhaul since I
don't know when and now represents a fusion of the very old - the
infrastructure of the bridge itself - and the modern, with the entire
span of the railway bridge covered in fan-like solar panels,
simultaneously providing Blackfriars station with a decent amount of
its annual power requirement as well as providing passengers on the
platform with some relief from the elements. In the tunnel, Daughter
2 danced to a South American band that was jamming out songs on
really basic equipment, raising a smile from the drummer. Out of the
main tunnel, she was fascinated by the wooden slats under the bridge
and also the remains of an older bridge just to the west of the
present Blackfriars Bridge. It's moments like this when constantly
pointing out things that you personally find interesting feels
suddenly worthwhile.
![]() |
| Source: MJA Smith |
At
Tate Modern I was hoping to see Kraftwerk's equipment being tidied
away following their concerts earlier in the week. I have a habit of
arriving at modern art museums just after they've played. I visited
MoMA in New York immediately after they'd played in 2012, and the crew were still packing their set away when we were in the museum. Alas,
this time there was no trace whatsoever in the Turbine Hall. We
headed up to the Surrealistic exhibit up on the second floor and
Daughter 2 spent the time seeing what was in the various pictures as
well as doing a really impressive job of explaining what it reminded
her of, what the shapes and obscure blurrings sort of looked like and
in some cases how it made her feel. I was really impressed with her
for being able to do this just before she turned five. We only looked
at that exhibit while we were there, and we careered round that at
pretty high speed, but it was brief time well spent.
Despite
Daughter 2's protestations that she was tired, we had no real choice
but to walk back to Charing Cross Road. On the Millennium Bridge we
bumped into around thirty congenial people dressed, for no
discernible reason, in animal costumes and on the north side, on the
approach to St. Paul's, encountered a headless street performer.
Walking along Queen Victoria Street we passed the ostentatious UK
headquarters of the Church Of Scientology and the new Blackfriars
station. 'Can we get a train from there?' pleaded Daughter 2 wearily,
but even if we'd wanted to there were no Tubes running on the lines
passing through the station anyway. As we approached Blackfriars, we
were greeted with the strange vision of a mainline train emerging
from behind the Bank of New York Mellon offices, having just come out
of the adjacent City Thameslink concourse, ascending the bridge to
stop at Blackfriars. It seemed totally out of place somehow, and
ultra futuristic despite being old rolling stock on a far older
bridge.
We
passed the expansive former estate of the Knights Templars, now home
to a complex of legal practices. The gardens at Temple are beautiful,
but also more or less inaccessible unless you're privileged to have
access to them. Perhaps I'm a conspiracy theorist after all, or
perhaps I've started to believe the hokum in Umberto Eco's Foucault's
Pendulum, but I did find myself shuddering as I walked past both
Temple and the Church of Scientology slightly earlier. Fortunately,
walking a little further on any sense of weirdness in the air
evaporated as we encountered the crowds of fashionistas queuing at
the Valentino exhibition; it seemed to restore a sense of
superficiality back to proceedings. In contrast to the well-dressed
crowd, we were passed by a pack of boys pulling tricks on
skateboards. 'I used to have a skateboard,' I told Daughter 2, now
being carried for a few hundred metres. 'Could you do that?' she
asked, as one of the kids flicked his board up, twirled it in midair
and landed on it perfectly. I sighed, thinking back to my heavy,
cheap deck bought from a toyshop in Westcliff-on-Sea in my youth.
'No,' I muttered. I could barely ride the thing, let alone do tricks.
Eventually
we got back to the Phoenix Theatre a few minutes before turning-out
time. As we approached the main entrance to the theatre, we took a
look at the progress being made on the Phoenix Garden. The Garden, an
old car park that was saved from being converted into luxury
apartments, is a charity space run by volunteers. It's one of those
places tucked away that retains a secretive, hidden quality in spite
of being surrounded on all sides by busy roads. The four of us
followed a guidebook to the garden once when looking for things to do
in London with children, and at the time the space was populated by a
mere smattering of people chilling out among the carefully maintained
but overgrown plantings. If it wasn't for the vigilance of the
volunteer workers and the absolute zero tolerance policy toward drugs
and alcohol in the park, you'd think it would be a key destination
for junkies and drunks. The day we were there a couple of years ago,
there was one trampy-looking guy snoring contentedly under a bush,
but otherwise it was a picture of conviviality and tranquility, a
couple of indie guys strumming an acoustic guitar aimlessly at the
back of the park next to some inoffensive graffiti, and the most
dangerous things that we saw that day were a lazy pollen-covered bee,
a tiny fieldmouse and a few ladybirds. The park was just a muddy mess
when Daughter 2 and I poked our noses through the bars that Saturday,
but I'm sure it will be returned to its bohemian splendour in no time
at all.
Emerging
from the theatre while Daughter 2 were topping up our energy levels
with a couple of handfuls of Jelly Belly sweets, Mrs S was gushing
about the quality of the dancing, while Daughter 1 explained that her
favourite sequence was the cameo by Russell Grant, much to her
mother's horror. The walk to Waterloo was dominated by Daughter 1
moaning about a stomach ache and Daughter 2 cheerfully explaining how
much fun she'd had. As we crossed the river - for Daughter 2 and I
this would be our third crossing of the afternoon - Daughter 1 was
back to her normal, enthusiastic chatty and observant self, a
pleasantly quiet Tube ride concluding another excellent afternoon of
exploring and - I hope - memory-making.
Friday, 19 April 2013
'Just a New York conversation / Rattlin' through my mind.'
| Source: MJA Smith |
'Just a New York conversation / Rattlin' through my mind.'
-
Lou Reed, 'New York Telephone Conversation', Transformer
(1975)
'Bless you.'
- Bryant
Park, Saturday afternoon
'Bless
you,' said the woman sat on one of the metal chairs scattered around
Bryant Park, reading the Saturday papers and wearing a pair of
oversized sunglasses to shield her eyes from the warm April sun. My
wife had just sneezed, and the woman had looked up from her paper as
we walked past, smiled and said 'bless you'. In uttering those two
words, New York City, where we'd arrived a couple of hours before,
seemed suddenly less oppressive, more friendly somehow.
'I
should go to a museum, a gallery or something,
I know; but when you live in New York, when it rains you just stay
indoors and, I don't know, do the cleaning
or something.'
- Rock Center Café, Saturday evening
We
were sat in the Rock Center Café, watching a mix of flamboyant
wannabes and hopeless amateurs skating on the ice rink at Rockefeller
Center, on the rink's last day until next winter. At one point the
ice was cleared and a guy proposed to his fiancee; we have to assume
she said yes. Everyone clapped.
After
a dinner of crab cakes and seasonal vegetables, the girls went out
with Mrs S to watch the skating, where a guy looking like Che Guevara
was impressing and irritating the other skaters by turns with some
quirky dancing. Paying the bill, I got chatting to the waiter, a big,
cuddly sort of a guy with a friendly demeanour, no trace of
snootiness in spite of the WASPy clientele at other tables. I
explained we'd just arrived in New York from two weeks in Orlando. He
told me he used to work at Disney World. I wasn't terribly surprised
to hear that.
In
exchange for his tip, I asked him if he could recommend anywhere in
New York to take children. In response, he proudly reeled off a whole
list of places and then took me over to a waitress, herself a mother
to a son, who offered up some more places - the American Museum Of
Natural History is the only one that springs to mind now - and the
guy wrote some of them down on the back of a receipt. All of the
places were already on our list of things we wanted to see or do
while we were in the city, but it was the easy conversation and
friendliness that made that post-dinner chat memorable.
'You
wan' lox-cream cheese or lox AND cream cheese?'
- Cafe Europa, W33 Street
- Pergola, W40 Street
- Montague Street Bagels, Montague Street, Brooklyn
- Ess-A-Bagel, Third Avenue
Never
ask for salmon. Well, not unless you want the server to give you a
stern, uncomprehending stare and the brusque question above.
We
ate bagels a few times while in New York. You have to really, and
it's hard to go wrong. The best bagels we had? They were from
Montague Street Bagels over in Brooklyn, eaten on a bench on the
pretty esplanade overlooking Manhattan's Financial District, watching
bankers, sundry execs and tourists taking helicopters from a helipad at the
island's southern tip. On the night before we flew home, Daughter 2
and I cut across town to Ess-A-Bagel, a deli over on Third Avenue, whose
bagels are highly recommended by locals. It turns out that they
weren't a patch on Montague Street in Brooklyn, and we managed to
lose Mrs S and Daughter 2 when we tried to regroup, instilling a
momentary panic given that Manhattan suddenly felt very large indeed.
'Do
you like poetry?'
- John's, W44 Street
We
were in John's Pizzeria near Times Square, ordering a take-out pizza
after a trip to a cinema on W42 Street. It was late and the kids
wanted to be in bed, but we were hungry and John's was just around
the corner from the hotel. This used to be the Midtown branch of the gruff Village location but is now totally separate. Mrs S and I had been to John's on Bleecker Street before the kids were born, so we had high hopes for the pizza here.
'Do
you like poetry?' asked the young guy at the booth who took our
takeaway order. By this time Mrs S and the girls were sat down on a
banquette, waiting, and I was looking at the restaurant's business
card, half-wondering why I pick these things up. The question caught
me off guard and I didn't quite know if he was talking to me.
'Sure,'
I responded. 'Sometimes.'
'I
write poetry. I wrote a poem earlier. Could I read it to you?'
When
I agreed, thinking how wonderfully odd this was, he read a short poem
written on a scrap of paper, called 'Norway', which he'd been
inspired to write after serving a young couple from that country
about an hour before. After he'd finished, he meticulously explained
what each line meant. I forget the message now, but it lead him on to
tell me how committed he was to his studies and his academic
endeavours. He gestured at the rest of the wait staff, telling me
that they were all wannabe actors or performers, that he thought it
was all fake and that few people wanted to make something of
themselves through hard work and commitment. I wished him well, told
him that being able to write was a gift, gave him my email address
after encouraging him to seek a publisher, and left, thinking how
typically New York it was to have that conversation.
'Children
are people too!'
- Sixth Avenue
In
a city of eight million people, seeing the same person twice is weird, let
alone statistically mind-bending.
This
utterance was hurled at us twice from a talkative black homeless guy
on Sixth Avenue on a corner somewhere between Central Park and Radio
City, in response to the four of us striding along the sidewalk. The
second time he said it, toward the end of our stay, I turned back and
offered him a smile. He returned my smile with a massive grin, a wink
and a gentle shake of the polysterene coffee cup filled with quarters
he was holding.
'It's
good to still be here.'
- Other Music, E4 Street
That's
what the dude behind the counter in Other Music said to me when I
said how pleased I was that this East Village institution was still
there. In the days before writing this section we've learned that
independent record store Bleecker Bob's in Greenwich had closed its doors forever. Indie record shops in cities across the
globe are shutting down as the influence of downloads and retailers
like Amazon deliver a more instant response to our music-consuming
needs. At least in 2012, Other Music was still there. I truly hope
they'll still be there when we return to New York this year.
We'd
walked into Other Music after I took Daughter 1 into the John
Varvartos store on the Bowery. That trendy outlet is the site of the old
CBGB venue. I wanted to take her there for several reasons, one being
that she loves my CBGB t-shirt, and another being that from an early
age I've been conditioning her to New York punk via Talking Heads,
Blondie and others. I have some great video footage of her
headbanging along to the first Ramones album, and Television's Marquee
Moon was, for a while, her favourite album in her iPod. The former
CBGBs was a curiously soulless place, the barest trace of the bastion
of New York's music scene to be found in the exposed brickwork, no
dirt or grit or energy among the racks of trendy clothes. Another
reason for nipping in here was because of a well-publicised display
of vintage vinyl. Considering the former venue was the revolution
against bloated Seventies rock, seeing loads of LPs by godawful bands
that the NY punk scene deliberately rejected was thoroughly
dispiriting. As was the burly security guard breathing down our
necks.
So
Other Music was like a welcome relief when we walked in. I
specifically wanted to buy Hurry Up, We're Dreaming by
M83. Being far too untrendy to know my way round the modern musical
maze of stratified sub-genres, I asked someone stacking new releases
onto the shelves to point me in the right direction and she was
really friendly and helpful, something you'll never get when shopping
on Amazon.
'Do
you need some directions?'
- Bleecker Street
We
weren't especially lost, that was the thing. We'd been walking round
Greenwich Village for most of the morning and had been enjoying
exploring the wonky streets and haunts of Beats and other cool people
from the Fifties and Sixties, looking for houses once lived in by
Dustin Hoffmann and Bob Dylan, looking down the road pictured on the
sleeve of Dylan's The Freewheelin Bob Dylan, drinking excellent
cappuccinos in Caffe Reggio and watching people playing chess in
Washington Square Park. A friendly man, with shopping bags and a
beaming smile saw us meandering down Bleecker past the red canopy of
the Village Vanguard, the important jazz venue that witnessed many an
important gig in jazz's heyday, and he assumed we were struggling to
navigate the complexity of the streets compared to the rest of
Manhattan. He's clearly never been to London.
That
said, it is a little confusing in the Village, and he seemed so keen,
and almost proud, to help that we didn't want to say no. At that
point we were on our way to the original Magnolia Bakery to buy
lavish cupcakes that would later be consumed on the High Line in the
shadow of the Standard hotel. He gestured down the street, gave us
the directions and he then walked off, smiling and evidently pleased
to have assisted some tourists trying really hard not to look like
tourists. An elderly lady in Brooklyn on Montague Street had also
gone out of her way to see if we needed directions while trying to
find the bagel shop, whereas earlier that day when we gingerly
approached two traffic cops to ask for directions on how to get onto
the Brooklyn Bridge they were smilingly obliging, which was a relief
of sorts. I thought they were going to arrest me for being so lost.
'It's
our best selling item.'
- A Salt And Battery, Greenwich Avenue
Immediately
before bumping into the helpful shopper by the Vanguard, we went for lunch at one of the
most baffling places we've come across in New York - A Salt And
Battery, an authentic fish and chip shop in the Village,
owned and staffed by English people. Sitting in the window eating
sustainable white fish and chips from little baskets while looking
out onto the quiet streets, and hearing the steady stream of English
and Irish accents of queuing customers, it felt like being back home
perhaps, even though we don't normally go to the chippy very often.
Talking
to the guy behind the counter, a warm guy that I swore was a dead
ringer for Jack Whitehall, I alighted upon a poster advertising that
deep-fried Cadbury Cream Eggs were back in stock. He explained that
it was the most popular thing on the menu, which I was slightly
aghast at. I took a photo of the poster and emailed it to a friend in
Edinburgh, the message saying that I thought he'd be really proud to
see Scottish cuisine making it to New York.
'Well,
because you asked so politely... I love the English accent!''
'Do
you like Only Fools And Horses?'
- Tony's di Napoli, W43 Street
We
had decided to go back to Tony's di Napoli just off Times Square,
regarded as one of the best family-run Italian restaurants in the
city. We'd been there on the Saturday, and with no other plans for
dinner, and it having been a massive hit with the girls (and us), we
decided to go back. Previously we'd booked, but this time we were
going in on spec, and having seen the hard-faced hostess
brusquely managing the pre-theatre crowd a few days before, I was a
little nervous. I needn't have worried, but in being a little
apprehensive I enquired of the (different) hostess with a bit more
pronounced politeness (remember 'please' and 'thank you' are not
common currencies in NYC) as to whether we could have a table of four
and despite being every bit as stern-looking as her colleague, her
face suddenly lit up and she became really friendly. Perhaps I'm a
little too conscious and embarrassed by my Englishness sometimes, and
I clearly forget that people like to hear the accent when you're
abroad, especially in the US.
The
appeal of our accents seemed to prevail as we were taken to our table
downstairs. After ordering drinks, including a fantastic Negroni for
me, our waiter took over the table. I can't remember what he looked
like now, but in my mind he reminds me of a blend of Adam Buxton and
Carrie's writer boyfriend Jack Berger in Sex And The City. Asking us
if we liked Only Fools And Horses in a Brooklyn accent was singularly
one of the most unexpected things we heard in New York. It turned out
his mother was English and so he'd been raised watching the sitcom,
but even if that was an entirely logical question for him to ask, it
was still pretty crazy to us. We all enjoyed our pasta and it's no
surprise that we'll be going back there again in May; we won't, on
the other hand, be going back to Carmine's on the Upper West Side,
which we went to on our last day, and which was nowhere near as nice.
'Are
you going to American Girl?'
- American Girl, Fifth Avenue
'Are you going to American Girl?' asked a former work colleague when
we popped into our firm's New York office to say hello. The question
was aimed at Daughter 1 and 2, who had been a bit grumpy and unruly
for most of the afternoon. It was our last day, we'd been away for
the best part of three weeks, and the week of walking around New York
was beginning to take its toll. A few minutes before, we'd gone
through the usual parental cycle of warnings that if they misbehaved
we'd have to take away the thing they'd been innocently looking
forward to most about New York; that thing was a trip to the American
Girl store on Fifth Avenue, and we'd been talking about it for
months.
So
the question left us in a tricky position, since they seemed to
take the enquiry as somehow meaning that, despite our warnings, the
nice lady had given them permission to go. And of course we
acquiesced, looked terribly inconsistent, and roughly three hours
later we walked out of American Girl carrying two dolls and a couple of
outfits with two very smug and satisfied young children. The dolls
were promptly christened Lily and Jessica, or Mortgage #1 and
Mortgage #2 as I call them. Another father in the queue and I shared
our amazement at the audacious cost, but handed over our credit cards
anyway. When the girls feel like it, they dress them and brush Lily
and Jessica's hair lovingly. When they don't we tell them they're bad
parents and that the dolls should be put up for adoption.
Friday, 9 November 2012
The Bryant Park Hotel
![]() |
| Source: TripAdvisor |
A
weekend Facebook post from the Bryant Park Hotel in the wake of
Hurricane Sandy, words to the effect that their staff had not worked
and that the hotel had no guests, made me realise that I'd not
written the positive review of this hotel that I'd meant to pull
together after our stay in April of this year.
My
wife and two daughters (5 and 4) spent a week at the Bryant Park
Hotel after a fortnight enjoying theme parks in Orlando. The original
intention of the stay in New York was to be a week spent enjoying the
city, doing more 'adult' things after two weeks of the comparative
unreality of Florida. As it happens, our two girls enjoyed endlessly
walking round Manhattan and Brooklyn every bit as much as we did.
Their prior knowledge of New York's unique topography has been
informed by the number of pictures, prints and books about the city
in our house and from seeing landmarks in films. But one of the
things that made their enjoyment of New York so strong was the hotel
itself.
The
Bryant Park Suite we had overlooking Bryant Park in the former
American Radiator Building was modern, clean, spacious and functional
without feeling too minimal. My eldest daughter slept on the day bed
in the window of the lounge while my youngest slept on a foldaway bed
a good few feet away. Despite the lounge being converted into a kids'
bedroom, it remained spacious and uncluttered throughout our stay,
and we made good use of the sofas and dining table, including one
night eating take-out pizza from John's at Times Square, and
occasional breakfast pastries from Pret or the patisserie across the
other side of the park. Every morning and evening the kids would rush
to the window to look out at the huddled skyscrapers of Midtown, the
changing colours of the spire of the Bank of America tower, the deep
canyon of Fifth Avenue and the people sitting .at tables in the park
or at the long benches visible through the windows at the rear of the
Library. To say they were enthralled by New York's vibrancy would be
a gross understatement, and we would all go to sleep at night with
the city's buzz pleasantly in our ears.
If
the suite was perfect enough, our stay was made all the better by the
staff at the hotel. When we arrived at the hotel from JFK, we were
greeted at the door by Ryan, with whom we spoke every day, talking
about what we were going to be doing that day and his readiness for
and apprehension over the birth of his daughter; at the desk we were
checked in by Chase, a really friendly guy who went out of his way to
greet us with a smile and a massive good morning every day we saw
him; and then there was Sarah at guest services who my youngest
daughter struck up a friendship with and who she would rush to see
whenever we passed through reception, Sarah on the last day fussing
over the American Girl dolls my two girls had twisted my arm to buy.
These three people were among the friendliest we've ever encountered
as a family, and the fact that I still remember them so fondly six
months on is testament to that. I can't thank them enough for how
welcoming and friendly they were - particularly in a trendy hotel
that's not necessarily best-known as a destination for families with
two small and very excited children.
The
Bryant Park is not a cheap hotel, but then again nowhere is in New
York. Nevertheless, its location right in the centre of Midtown,
effortless stylishness and general atmosphere are worth paying for. I
took one trip to the basement bar and the crowd on a midweek evening
was a cool mix of office workers and über-hip young adults; one
evening we came back from a long day's schlepping round the streets
to find a huge queue at the door of the hotel. After skipping right
past the line thanks to being residents, we asked what was going on.
The security guard, an intimidating but cheerful guy, told me there
were two events that evening, an NFL Draft party and a private
fashion show up in the penthouse. At the time it seemed perfectly
normal, both for New York and for the Bryant Park, but looking back
now it seems otherworldly.
Staying
a week in New York is, it seems, relatively uncommon. People tend to
spend a weekend or a few days and strike the main landmarks off the
'must-do' list. After our week-long stay and our return to the UK, we
resolved to go back again, feeling like we had what we've described
as 'unfinished business' in the city, and will be heading back to
Manhattan again next May. For us it would be unimaginable not to stay
at the faultless Bryant Park Hotel again, and so that's exactly where
we will be heading to next year. It cannot come soon enough.
Once
again, my thanks to the staff mentioned above for making our stay so
enjoyable.
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